I Will Leave This Here

So here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Leave all your cares and anxieties at the feet of the Lord, and measureless grace will strengthen you. Psalm 55:22 TPT

And just what is grace? That would be the undeserved or unmerited favor of God. It’s basically something you can’t earn, but something He gives. And David states that it will strengthen you. Well I don’t know about you, but I could use some of that today!

Not long ago, Walt went into the hospital to check on a mass they found located in his pancreas. It was totally unexpected, and by the time we got an appointment to get it checked out, he had developed croup, which threw him into congestive heart failure which also affected his liver and kidneys. Three short days after being admitted to the hospital, I was told that I needed to check into Hospice, as they didn’t think he would recover.

That night, I went home and cried all night long. I felt as if someone had punched me in the gut. I suppose looking back, I was in shock. I mean, who wouldn’t be? I grieved all night, but just before dawn I said, “Father, You’ve give me 45 years with this gift of a husband. I’m thankful. Whatever Your plan is, I release Him into it. I can’t change Your plans, or even hope to change Your mind. Thank You for the grace to get me through this. I’m not giving up or giving in, I’m giving him over to You. You’re the only one I trust with this husband of mine.”

Just before dawn, I heard the Lord speak, “Get up, take your tablet into his room, shut the door and worship me.” So I did. I did it through my tears. I did it because He asked. I just worshipped. It wasn’t long before nurses came in, commenting on how that song had brought them through a trial. One nurse came in and sat at the end of her shift, pulled up a stool and took my hand and asked me about our marriage. I ended up encouraging her in her relationship.

The next day, I went up and Walt was sitting up in bed, awake, aware and changed. The doctors were all encouraged and couldn’t believe the what a difference a day made. Two weeks in the hospital, two more weeks in rehab and he came home. Off most of his meds, weakened by the ordeal, but stronger each day.

We just received the lab report on the endoscopy they did on his pancreas. It was a benign cyst, nothing more we need to do.

Guess who’s thankful? Me! Why, because as I surrendered my tenuous hold on trying to control an uncontrollable situation, I discovered that that was all He wanted.

Do you remember the old hymn, “Leave it there, leave it there, take your burdens to the Lord and leave it there. If you’ll trust and never doubt, He will surely bring you out. Take your burdens to the Lord and leave it there.”

It’s been a hard 2 years, but we’re still married, still here, still encouraging others and most of all, we’ve increased greatly in our trust in His promises. Regardless if it makes sense or not, regardless of what it looks like in the natural.

He’s worth trusting!

Sandy G

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