“Everyone who hears my teaching and applies it to his life can be compared to a wise man who built his house on an unshakable foundation. When the rains fell and the flood came, with fierce winds beating upon his house, it stood firm because of its strong foundation.
“But everyone who hears my teaching and does not apply it to his life can be compared to a foolish man who built his house on sand. When it rained and rained and the flood came, with wind and waves beating upon his house, it collapsed and was swept away.” Matthew 7:24-27 Passion Translation
Ask any builder and they will tell you, a good foundation is crucial to maintaining the structural integrity of the building. If you cut corners on the foundation, the structure will not hold up during storms or earthquakes. The money you attempt to save by purchasing substandard product, will only end up costing more in the long run.
Ask any marriage expert and they will say the same thing. Skimping or skipping the foundation will cost you in your future. Walt and I have done pre-marital coaching for years. It doesn’t solve every problem, but it sure gives you the tools you need to succeed. Of course if you choose to use your hand instead of a hammer, well, that’s your choice. But those who learn how to use the tools find it much less painful.
Walt and I started out with no premarital, just a short meeting with the pastor that I don’t even remember. Our marriage suffered in those first 7 years and our children still remember some of those tug-of-wars we had. The best thing that happened to us is when Walt decided he wanted to be a marriage counselor through our church. When he first told me what he wanted to do, I almost laughed. But the Holy Spirit very clearly told me to encourage him and I did.
After only three classes, he came home, sat me down on the couch and told me how sorry he was for never considering my needs. It was the beginning or tearing down what we’d so haphazardly constructed with our two wills, and discovering the tools to make a great marriage. It was hard. It was painful. There were times I wanted to quit. But we will celebrate our 45th anniversary in February, a surprise to many, but a celebration to us.
We are forever grateful for the foundation we found in our relationship with Jesus. To know His love and learn to lavish that love on each other, is amazing. There was a time I could love others, but not him. Now I love, honor and respect him and the more I do, the more I receive back in return.
There’s an old song that comes to mind:
On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
Built to Last,
Congratulations to you and Walt for 45 years of marriage in February!
I suspect there are many who are using their hand, instead of a hammer, in personal relationships. Marital bliss rarely happens on it’s own, it takes hard work—as you have noted. Blessings
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